Conversation With An Alien (2001) [N/A]
Featuring:
Tom Bache-Wiig, Earl E. Bates III, John Michael Lee
Written by:
Geoffrey Hartig
Directed by:
Geoffrey Hartig
Release Date:
February 28, 2001
Original Title:
Conversation With An Alien
Genres:
Science Fiction
Production Companies:
Inflight Productions
Pathfinder Pictures
Ratings / Certifications:
N/A
Runtime: 90
Greedy Earthlings! Prepare to Die!
Archeologist Smith accidentally stumbles upon an ancient alien ship filled with treasures, along with the fatally injured, yet still alive, alien captain. Smith soon develops strange psychic abilities and keeps the alien as a prisoner in his lab, where he abducts other humans and performs bizarre experiments on them. One of the captives joins forces with the imprisoned alien captain to overthrow the crazed archeologist by summoning help from outer space
Wow. Just...wow. I have seen some stinkers in my time, but this one just takes the cake. I realize that this is a pretty bold statement, but there are no two ways about it - this movie has THE WORST computer graphics EVER.Remember the game Myst? The original one? That's how this movie looks. The CGI stuff just LOOKS like it was done on a computer about 10 years ago. Every flippin' scene just screams VIDEO GAME!!! I'm serious here, the stuff is awful. Yet they keep right on using it, scene after scene after scene. Probably 2/3 of the movie plays like you're trapped on Myst island, only the plot sucks. More so.Ah yes, the plot. Where to begin. First off, the movie claims to be "based on a true story." Their definition of "true" must be pretty close to my definition of "false," because nothing even remotely similar to ANY of the events in the movie EVER HAPPENED. It pretty much goes downhill from there. Of course, the fact that nothing appears to happen for long stretches doesn't help. Even worse, when stuff does happen, it's unintelligible. Frankly, the whole thing is a confused mess.I'm not even going to mention the acting, which ranges from awful to farcical. Actually, the idea that this movie may have been intended as a spoof is easier to swallow, except for the fact that nothing particularly funny ever happens. Of course, that's only because nothing really happens at all.This movie hurts. Big time. It's annoying, it's confusing, and it goes absolutely nowhere. And the CGI stuff still looks like some particularly crappy point-and-click adventure game from 1995. Seriously, do yourself a favor, pass this movie by and go play Riven. The graphics are a lot better and so is the acting (wow - never thought I'd be praising the acting in a Myst game). This one conversation you DO want to miss.
